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December 17, 2011

I Want to be... SKINNY!?

Okay, let me explain.
1. that title was mainly for attention BUT, there is truth to it.

Here's the break down:
I know and understand that I am AVERAGE. Meaning that I know that I am not "fat" or "skinny".
However, I want to bust out of that boundary, to go beyond having a body that I consider to be more than just average.

So how am I average? I'm going to be real, and honest here.
I am not the stick skinny type of girl. I fall in the healthy, even fit range. But, I do have a little tummy and some unwanted fat here and there. I got meat and curves, in fact, I am considered to be on the thicker side side as opposed to the super thin side(IMO). And as crazy as it may sound... I don't like it.

Why? Simple. Although I live in North America... I am completely influenced(aka. brainwashed) by Asian standards. I know I am not alone in this though.

Sad isn't it? I have friends who see me go swimming covered up and they yell at me saying "HECK, If I had your body... dklagjasdfkhgla"  and so on. But, even if I try, I just... can't like it.

However, I know I need to accept it and I just need to work with my body type. So that is what this post is for.

So what am I going to do about this?

For starters,
If I had to put this into Kpop terms...
(Kpop influenced me most about weight and appearance btw, if you haven't figured.)
The first photo in this post is a picture of Goo Hara(KARA). She has a 21inch waist, 'nuff said. Even though it's natural for her. It's SKINNY to many others, and so they envy.

Now, idols such as Bora, Hyorin(Sistar) and Hyosung(Secret) best match what my body type is. They are more "voluminous" as some have put it, when compared to other girl groups.

Bora(black), Hyorin(pink)


Media heavily influences, so why can't I use it to influence me in a better way? Rather than obsessing myself over the tall, thinner ones, shouldn't I be inspired by those who are more "healthy" looking? I need a motivator, a goal, that is REASONABLE. I guess, at times... I can love the more curvy and voluminous body type. 

But really, I need to work on my own perceptions, and there is a LONG WAY TO GO.

Yet, there lies another problem... I know A LOT about health and fitness, and how to view things in a balanced matter. No joke. Then, why am I complaining?


It's one thing to know something, but it's another to follow and believe.

I know my weaknesses and I have yet to know my limits. Therefore this post marks my beginning of sticking with a goal. To have it clear in front of me.

This is an average girl's physical journey to becoming BETTER, STRONGER and hopefully, happier.
Physically that is.

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So what is my body type?
Well vaguely, I am a small framed, pear(by measurements).
My weight?
it fluctuates between 116-118lbs
My height?
Standing at 5'4''

I am classified as average or fit. I work out around 3-5days/week if not almost everyday.
Seems good right? Where's the problem?
I. can. eat. or binge... and I love bread... every girls nightmare!! This results in me not having the body I aim for... So basically, I am just balancing it out, not being able to go over and beyond.

I don't need to lose weight. I know that.
Yet I can't say that I just want to be healthy and that I don't want to lose weight, I'd be lying.
In the end though, as long as I am content and happy, numbers do not matter that much.

My goals(plainly and specifically put) are to be around 110lbs, to get the 11 ab lines :D and to overall become thinner and stronger.. among other things.

What am I fixed on doing?

I will not binge(of course, balance is needed though).
I will do my best to eat fresh prepared food(stick with a proper diet).
I will accept and love my own appearance.

WILL reach my goals. I AM determined.
must keep these in mind.

I guess posting this is to motivate me to try harder with all my effort. If I fail at anything, I expect constructive critism that will make me feel HORRIBLE. Which is good, because it might push me to do better ^^

If any of you want to embark on this journey with me. By all means!
Let me know what you guys think too!

1 comment:

  1. I know this acticle is old but I just saw it right now xD
    This is just awesome! I aspire to be like you~ I felt this way too! C:
    I want to build muscle and become stronger >.<